Helpful or Hurtful?

Ephesians 4:29

Our words can be either helpful or hurtful. Words are important, especially when you consider how many you speak each day. According to a study, a person can speak on average up to 16,000 words a day.[1] Unfortunately, when we think of appropriate speech, we tend to only think of such things as profanity or something vulgar. While this is obviously important[2], Christians are to go even further regarding their speech. They are to only use speech that builds up rather than tears down.

Paul wrote in Ephesians 4 many exhortations related to the believers walk with the Lord Jesus. As in many of Paul’s letters, the second half of Ephesians is the application of the doctrine already taught. In this case, having dealt with several things that believers should not do, in Ephesians 4:29 Paul exhorts what they should not say. Paul states that a believer should not say any “unwholesome” (corrupt) words. Unwholesome (saprós) means bad, rotten, putrid, and corrupt.

“The word corrupt (unwholesome) is used of that which is worthless or useless, as well as that which is rotten or decayed. Not just foul language is prohibited, but any and all use of speech which is of no value.”[3] 

Instead of simply warning against unwholesome words, Paul provides a positive alternative. Our speech should strengthen others, suit the situation, and show grace. The word edification (oikodomḗ) means to strengthen, build up, and pictures the act of building something. In this case, Paul is stating that our words should build up rather than tear down. Next, he states that the words should be suitable (appropriate) for the occasion. Finally, a believer’s words should be gracious in the sense of being helpful and encouraging.

“Instead of using his mouth for worthless speech, the Christian should concentrate on making a positive contribution. The Christian should be concerned that his speech builds up rather than tears down, and that it fills needs rather than increases them. The goal is that it will “minister grace” to those who hear.”[4]

Whether we speak 6,000 or 16,000 words a day, we need to be certain they are helpful rather than hurtful. That they build up a person rather than tear them down. As Proverbs 15:23 states, “A man has joy in an apt answer, And how delightful is a timely word.”

Lord, thank you for reminding me that my words matter. Help me to say only what is good for building up, words that fit the moment and give grace to those who hear. Guard my tongue from what is hurtful or corrupt, and let my speech be pleasing to You. In Jesus’ name we pray, Amen.

Blessings,

Pastor Steven

[1] https://www.wikihow.com/How-Many-Words-Does-the-Average-Person-Say-a-Day. Accessed June 2025.

[2] See Ephesians 5:4.

[3] Homer Kent. Ephesians Commentary, pg. 84.

[4] Ibid, pg. 78.